Dear Father in Heaven I lift up my son David today, he is hurting mentally today Father, hurting so bad that it is tough to look at him. His hurt is so deep, he is really starting to question why Father, why him and why he is not getting better. He is miserable, he is starting to doubt his reason for still being here, his spirits are failing and I have tried everything. He knows you and loves you my Lord and wants you to help him but he is so tired my Father. His depression is getting deep Father and I need you to touch him the way that only you can my Lord. Place your loving arms around him my Lord and love him the way I know that you love all of us, let him know that you are there and you will not leave him during this time. That he can yell and scream at you and you can take it. He needs you right now my dear Father in Heaven. In your precious son's name. Amen.
Dear friends, David is really struggling mentally. This ordeal is really starting to weigh on him and it is hard to watch. I am no longer going to push the positive on him because honestly he knows all of that and that isn't what he needs right now. He needs time to be angry and to be depressed but I pray that it quickly passes and that he relys on the Lord during this time. I feel so badly for him because honestly no 19 year old should ever have to go through what he is going through and what he has had to go through. He is having a hard time accepting and dealing with how sick he really is because up until the last week he never really felt sick, he was really sick but he never really felt as sick as he really was. Now everyday he throws up every 30-45 min, he sleeps every 20 min off and on, and he just doesn't feel good. This is not something he is used to, and this is all hard for him to accept and deal with. He is totally done with all of this, and I can't blame him one bit.
Also, several people have called me and emailed me questioning our decision about the "no visitors". I have to respect David's decision about this, and it isn't anything personal about one person, he just doesn't feel good. I think my friend Monica summed it up really well last night on the phone with me. She said, "until you see him in person you don't really realize how sick he really is". It is one thing to puke your guts out in front of your mom and even your grandma, it is another thing to puke in front of your friends. Please respect his decision and realize that he is going through a really tough time right now. He loves everyone, we all do, and none of us could be going through any of this without you, but he needs some time to be sad and to deal with this.